24/06/2010. Happy Drug User.

Yes I do believe I am sick.

I really do, dear only reader of my burnt blasted blog.

I suffer from a disease called Megadethaholism... Its like alcoholism.

Even Worse!

Doctors said that there is no cure for my case.

No cure at all...

You know sometimes I feel like I've got some kind of cancer.

Or a heart disease -my heart beats and aches every time I take my drug, thats why.

And then... then the world becomes beautiful and magical...

and hah, even more romantic.

They make me dream of other worlds where I can safely travel..

They force me to love every little part in my life with no suspensions..

They make me creative, enhance my will to give, to gift and to hope;

to hope that someday I will attend one of their concerts again..
And feel the same shot straight into my heart..

Maybe I could go backstage, who knows..

I am so filled with memories from that One Night In Athens.

I think I was in heaven for an hour.

You know, when Dave said: "Thank you all guys, you were great"

and started raining,

I lied down to the ground

And begged God to take me with him

by his side...

Cuz I felt so happy that I wanted to die that way.

Then was the time I wondered:

"Will He ever know that I exist?

Will he ever know that somebody in this universe 

wakes up (dead) and sleeps

just because of HIS existence?"

I never got the answer of course.

And I probably never will.

But we live for hopes dreams and memories...

And I hope for him, dream of him, remember him.

The 24th of June 2010

will be forever etched in my heart's book
with a rusty pen
and a perpetual ink

as that one day we live

only once towards our path to heaven..

And as a Nevermore song says:

"Memory lives in a shadow

nevermore will I blame

and I swear till the end of my days

I will not forget that one moment.."

They certainly are the most powerful drug.

And I am strongly addicted.